Hello Internet! Here’s the deal.

Hello, Internet.

I am Jester Merit Pear, but you can call me Jester. We will get along, I can tell.

Welcome to the site! Here is a place where I review literature on a somewhat regular basis. I am cynical, yes. Hypercritical? Definitely. Woefully uninformative? Maybe. And [I put spoilers in square brackets]. But you’ll like me anyway. Because we’re all new to this, I’m going to explain the rules of this blog.

Rule 1: I am God. I am the owner of this site. Therefore, I am the one person who has total control over all areas of this site. Don’t like what I say, do, speak badly of, etc? Deal with it. Or see Rule 4. Yes, I swear sometimes to make a point or just because. No, I will not change things just because you pick up on them. Except for spelling and punctuation. That stuff bugs me.

Rule 2: I review literature. That includes: Novels, Ebooks, Graphic Novels, Manga and Comic Books (to some extent). I don’t do movies, TV shows, webcomics, video games, anything that isn’t canon (see my Ao3 account if you think that it’s worth your time) and I sure as hell won’t stare at art and judge it, there are balding old men in ill-fitting cheap suits bought on clearance for that.

Rule 3: No numerical data. I am a reviewer. I’m not a rater. Anyone can give an amount of rubber chickens and it won’t really mean squat, except for the addition to the massive scoreboard that is the universe. Only I can rant on for a page or so and make people like me shoving my opinion down their throats. And no, no matter how much I’m asked, I will not give you a star rating for that new book I’m reading, even if it is better than Potter.

Rule 4: I am a good person to talk to. Don’t like the fact I dismissed Mr/Ms Fanservice because they didn’t get enough character development? Loved my review of the latest horror book? Hate my slightly condescending demeanor? Admire my style and want to send me flowers? Don’t like my face? Contact me! I’ll get back to you with an answer over a couple of words. That’s my guarantee until the end of time. Even trolls are welcome, but don’t expect a nice reply.

So are we clean? Good. So stick with these simple rules, and everything else is cream cheese.

Yours: J.M. Pear

Hello Internet! Here’s the deal.